Southern Knights: The Movie

This is a last minute entry for the 8/28/09 Friday Challenge, write a scenario for a movie of the Southern Knights comic book series.


Dragon has changed into his human guise, Mark Dagon, in order to go shopping for party supplies for the Southern Knights celebration that night. They are celebrating getting out of Atlanta. Their new location will be Hookworm, Mississippi, and they are planning to leave the next day.

While he is in the 7-11, a crazy but beautiful (in a slutty way) woman comes in with a big gun, looking for her ex-boyfriend. She sees Mark and thinks he's the boyfriend and shoots him three times in the back. When he falls down, she sees he's not the boyfriend, and she drags his unconscious body out to her car and drives him back to her dumpy, run-down shack out in the rural outskirts of Atlanta.

He is not quite dead, and she nurses him for a month until he regains consciousness. He has amnesia and doesn't remember he is really a dragon. She has fallen in love with him while he was unconscious, and he becomes her current boyfriend. She convinces him he used to help her rob convenience stores, and they eventually go out to rob one.

Meanwhile back at the ... lair of the Southern Knights, when Dragon never shows up, they go looking for him, but can't find him. They decide he has left the gang because he didn't really want to leave Atlanta, so they go on to Hookworm without him. But about six months later, they see security camera pictures of him robbing a 7-11 in Atlanta with his girlfriend ("Do you know either of these people? Call this number to tip off the police."), and they recognize him and go back to Atlanta to rescue him from this life of crime.

The ex-boyfriend also sees the pics and recognizes the ex-girlfriend, and he knows where to find her. So he goes to her shanty to try to rescue her from this life of crime. He is not the horrible monster you might have thought, but rather just a bumbling idiot. (Perfect part for Larry the cable guy.)

When Larry arrives at the shack, he manages to make Mark really mad, and he changes into Dragon unexpectedly. Dragon is horrified and thinks he has become a monster, and he goes off to find a bridge to jump from. Unfortunately, he can fly, so he isn't hurt by jumping.

At that moment, the Southern Knights show up and explain to him who he is and what he does. They want him to come back home to Hookworm, Mississippi, but he doesn't believe them, and flies off into the sunset.

The remainder of the Southern Knights become very depressed and stop saving people, and Kristin especially begins to act out. She starts dressing in Daisy Dukes and wet t-shirts, and hangs out in bars trying to pick up men by dancing in irresistably sexy ways. When Larry arrives in the bar, they hook up and live unhappily ever after.

The End